As wedding photographers who are 7+ years out from our own wedding, we thought it would be fun (and hopefully helpful) to reflect on our own wedding and what we wish we had done differently looking back, and also what we are glad we did and would keep the same. Ultimately, we don't have huge regrets over anything we did or didn't do, but looking back we recognize that even though our marriage is WAY more important than the wedding day itself was, it's also a once in a lifetime celebration!
Here's part two on what we WOULDN'T change from our own wedding, once again collaborated by both of us :) You can find part one here.
We wouldn't change the amount of thought we put into our ceremony (or how long it was). For what we lacked in planning for our reception, we are SO glad we put a lot of thought into our ceremony (and also really thankful for such a phenomenal message by our pastor at the time, Myron Crockett). To us, marriage is a big deal. For us, it's just as much about our commitment to the Lord as it is to each other. We wanted our ceremony to reflect that, and we weren't afraid to have a longer ceremony to do so. Not that we might not have tweaked a few things here and there if doing it again, but as a whole we really loved how it turned out! And Myron, if you happen to read this - thank you so much for the thoughtful, excellent message you gave. We are so grateful!
We wouldn't change the fact that we wrote our own vows. Writing your own vows definitely isn't for everyone, but we're so glad we went that route! We loved the personal touches we were able to add and being able to say exactly what we wanted to say rather than just repeating something generic.
We wouldn't change our decision to go to each row to greet and dismiss guests. A wedding day is so hectic and it can be hard to get to see everyone sometimes. It was so nice being able to individually thank each guest, and we love looking at all of the photos of us greeting them all!
We still wouldn't go CRAZY with spending. While we noted in part one that we wish we would have given ourselves a bit bigger of a budget, we are also glad that we didn't go CRAZY with our spending. We invested a lot of time and energy into building a foundation for a great marriage, which to us is so, so much more important than planning a wedding! And by not going wild with spending, we've been able to do a lot of things we might not have otherwise accomplished, or not accomplished as quickly if we had spent tens of thousands on our wedding day.
We wouldn't change the fact that we saved our first kiss for our wedding ceremony. You read that right. We are one of *those* couples ;) A bit crazy to a lot of people, but we're still glad we went this route. Nick and I wanted our relationship to be built on so much more than just the physical aspect of it. Choosing to do this (and having a good part of our relationship long distance) helped us to be great communicators and find other ways to show our care and love for each other. Again, saving your first kiss for the wedding ceremony especially is not for everyone and that's totally fine! We do want to encourage others, though, that marriage is SO much more than physical intimacy (though to be candid, we think that aspect of marriage is fantastic too!), and entering into a marriage built on or mostly around that is a shaky foundation.
We wouldn't change who we married. Okay so OBVIOUSLY this is a given ;) But the first thing Nick said when I asked him what things he wouldn't change about our wedding was, "the bride". So I had to include it :) As we've mentioned before, we are no where near perfect as a couple (and both in need of grace). We have to work at this marriage thing too! But we are so incredibly grateful we get to do life with each other, and our hope for every couple is to see them embracing and supporting one another through life's trials instead of pushing one another away or retreating into yourself. Relationships in general aren't easy, let alone in marriage, but they are so worth it!
For other married couples, what are some things you're really glad you did for your wedding/things you wouldn't change? Let us know in the comments!
Photos by Annie Crawford - an aspiring photographer at the time, and now an owner of her own photography business: Crawford Photo Co. :) Go check out her recent work to see how far she's come! And I apologize some are blurry :( Couldn't find my CD of pictures in time to publish this, so these are all downloaded off of Facebook.